tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6144399754818696603.post45613295357580448..comments2023-10-05T03:21:41.343-06:00Comments on Invictus Pilgrim: Virtue in PainInvictus Pilgrimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15961213460164925021noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6144399754818696603.post-30002871726240366272011-08-06T19:36:36.366-06:002011-08-06T19:36:36.366-06:00There is a popular belief in the LDS church that w...There is a popular belief in the LDS church that we are supposed to work really hard and perfect ourselves. If perfection seems overwhelming, simply taking it one task at a time seems doable. "We can be perfect in paying tithing," they say, "and then we can be perfect in such-and-such. Don't think it is beyond your ability."<br /><br />I can't tell you how many times I have heard that sentiment in sunday school or priesthood meeting. But it is not the gospel.<br /><br />And neither is the phrase “I never said it would be easy; I only said it would be worth it."<br /><br />Actually, this is what Jesus said: "Take my yoke upon you, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light."<br /><br />The gospel is not a difficult set of hurdles to be crossed, nor a strict set of precepts to be followed. Rather, the gospel is a relationship with God, entered into through baptism, wherein we are perfected through and in Christ and made new creatures through the sanctifying power of the spirit.Steven Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00181540076161181306noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6144399754818696603.post-51447297829280303832011-08-06T05:33:17.620-06:002011-08-06T05:33:17.620-06:00" ... and men are, that they might have joy.&..." ... and men are, that they might have joy."<br /><br />Thanks for your thoughts, Beck. Always good to hear from you. As a general comment, and not a comment on any particular situation - including yours - the question is: what role does self play in the determination of what is "good" and what is "better"? Does self become merely a means to an end? Whose end?Invictus Pilgrimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15961213460164925021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6144399754818696603.post-46146334567321246612011-08-05T17:44:37.324-06:002011-08-05T17:44:37.324-06:00I was taught that sacrifice meant: "giving up...I was taught that sacrifice meant: "giving up something 'good' for something 'better'". <br /><br /> I've bought into that catchy phrase and all it means (including the promises of eternity, and have tried to govern my life accordingly...<br /><br />but to what detriment? often it feels like I'm sacrificing myself in the process... and for what purpose? The hope of something better in the next life at the sacrifice of missing the lessons and experiences of "joy" and "happiness" in this life?<br /><br />Sooner or later, what is "good" verses "better" blurs in not being as clear as I once thought. Thank goodness for hope. If I lost my hope I don't think I could hang on much longer.Beckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06159223254071653666noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6144399754818696603.post-88451061695082228492011-08-05T16:05:37.535-06:002011-08-05T16:05:37.535-06:00Anonymous - Thanks for your comments. I am sincer...Anonymous - Thanks for your comments. I am sincerely happy for you and your husband that you guys are able to make your marriage work and that you are as supportive as you are of your husband. You obviously must love him very much.<br /><br />My marriage did not fail because of "SSA". My wife and I were on the cusp of divorce when I came out. But if you are at all familiar with my blog, you know that it is very personal. I make no judgments on other peoples' situation - particularly on other mixed-orientation marriages, for I know that EACH one is different. I honor your commitment to each other.<br /><br />What I will say, however, is that it is unfortunate that, after you ask others not to judge nor situation, you turn around and implicitly judge others through use of such phrases as "tasted of the living waters" and "certain responsibility" and "chosen to honor the covenants" etc. <br /><br />Woven throughout these comments is a point of view that is, frankly, judgmental and extremely presumptuous. Please understand that no one is judging you because of your choices, including your faith. You, however, are judging others because of their presumed lack of faith and unwillingness to "honor the covenants" and - ultimately - their choice to view life in a different way than you do. <br /><br />My purpose is not to be offensive, but to be instructive. I choose not to take offense at the implied judgments and presumptions in your comments, but I would like to make you aware of how they are perceived.Invictus Pilgrimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15961213460164925021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6144399754818696603.post-51324462131458423482011-08-05T14:35:37.021-06:002011-08-05T14:35:37.021-06:00I agree that you can be happy without the Gospel i...I agree that you can be happy without the Gospel in your life. There are many people around the world that are proof of that. But once you have tasted of the living waters and have been given the truth, there is a certain responsibility that goes along with that. I'm sorry that your marriage fell apart, but I want you and others to know that just because you or your husband/wife may have SSA does not mean that your marriage will inevitably fail. My husband and I are living proof of that. He struggles with it daily and I am there supporting him in any and all the ways I can. He chooses to live the Gospel standards because he has tasted of the living waters and knows that is the only way. God's way. Our marriage has lasted and will last forever because we both of chosen to honor the covenants we made with God. I know the struggle SSA can be, I see it everyday. But let's not forget that it is possible to be heterosexually married and HAPPY.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6144399754818696603.post-48987742126641450802011-08-04T10:10:04.499-06:002011-08-04T10:10:04.499-06:00Thanks, TGD, for sharing these thoughts and experi...Thanks, TGD, for sharing these thoughts and experiences. Yes, happiness is suspect and resented by many within the Church. Their lives are miserable, to one degree or another, and they resent those who have thrown off shackles of one type or another and are experiencing happiness as a result. I truly believe that this resentment fuels much bigotry, not only in our church, but in all conservative Christian churches (and indeed among many who are politically conservative).Invictus Pilgrimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15961213460164925021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6144399754818696603.post-52970062841460546862011-08-04T06:56:42.556-06:002011-08-04T06:56:42.556-06:00At the beginning you spoke of all the ways in whic...At the beginning you spoke of all the ways in which life is suppose to be a struggle. <br />Which is just one of the many granite filters that the true believing Mormons see the world through. Comprehension of happiness is really only in the next life. And yet, they can't seem to make up their mind which way it is. <br /><br />The fiends I once had who misread my depression as humility, believed that my struggles showed that I was a really spiritually happy person. And I started to believe that emotional angst was what spirituality was suppose to be.<br /><br />Some of those friends got to see my anger as I was leaving, they were convinced that it was the torments and punishment from leaving the truth. And evidence that happiness was only possible in the church.<br /><br />I left and got control of my thoughts and got angry, to let that depression out and let it go. And the anger soon passed. And the joy and happiness began to appear. I had struggled, but I didn't fall in love with the struggle, as Mormons we are taught to do. I let it go. <br /><br />Those friends I once had who saw my happiness after I came out and processed my anger, distrusted me. They were convinced that I had fallen. And I was no longer an influence in their lives that could be trusted as good as they saw it. Satan was no longer bothering me as we were all taught. My thinking and attitudes were no longer narrow and they became threatening to all that they understood.<br /><br />How could someone be happy when they are not in the church, following the prophet etc. But then life is suppose to be a miserable struggle? But there are a lot of genuinely very happy Mormons out there. Have they fallen to satin? Why isn't their life a miserable depressing struggle? Well they are so righteous that they can't be tempted. etc.<br /><br />Oh the crazy things our brains have to do to see things through granite filters. It's easier to just scribble pictures and cast shadows on the wall and convince yourself that that is the real world.TGDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01787370282987477869noreply@blogger.com