Invictus Pilgrim

A Gay Man's Journey out of the Closet, Marriage and Mormonism toward Self-Love and Self-Discovery

Mixed-Orientation Marriage Posts


At the suggestion of a reader, I have prepared this page in order to list all the posts on this blog that deal with men who are currently in, have been or are contemplating a mixed-orientation marriage (i.e., man is gay, woman is straight, or woman is lesbian, husband is straight).



 "Real" Family vs. The "Family"


 Family Encore: Living With Reality and Finding Peace


 Family: Necessary But Not Sufficent


 Family: Hammering Away at our Souls


 To Young Men Only: The Gay Version


A Situation That Defies Our Nature


Mixed Orientation Marriages Revisited: Peace in Being Real


Mixed Orientation Marriages Revisited: To Just Accept Me


Dear Anonymous: The Matter of "Being Someone You're Not"


The Toll:  Inside a Mormon Mixed-Orientation Marriage


Voices: An Overwhelming Emptiness


Voices: Falling Away


An Overwhelming Emptiness:
Reprise and Reflections



Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
The Challenge


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
My Story, Part 1


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
My Story, Part 2


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
Patriarchy and Duplicity


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues: 
"Turn it Off"


To Young Men Only: 
The Gay Version (v. 1.1)



To The One:
 Suppression and Undeviating Determination



Beards, Masks and MetaFilter:
 New Perspectives



Masks: Landing Gay Side Up


Virtue in Pain


Kiss the Air


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“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

- Marcel Proust


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Pilgrim: One who journeys in foreign lands

One way leads to diamonds,
one way leads to gold,
Another leads you only
To everything you're told.

In your heart you wonder:
Which of these is true:
The road that leads to nowhere,
The road that leads to you ...

Pilgrim in your journey,
You may travel far;
For pilgrim, it's a long way
To find out who you are ...

~ Enya

Popular Posts

  • What About Gay Sex?
    Since starting my blog, I have occasionally received an e-mail or message that concerns gay sex.  Not that anyone was hitting on me.  And i...
  • Icarus: Did I Fly Too High?
    T hese past two weeks since I started this blog have been a roller coaster, taking me to dizzying heights, then plunging me into deep d...
  • Mormon Beards – Exploring the Issues: The Challenge
    “So I found out a friend from my freshman ward is doing the "I'm in the closet and I mess around with guys but I'm not gay and...
  • Advent Memories: Ave Maria
    For many Mormons, any version of the Christmas classic, Ave Maria , is hopelessly tainted by its association with Catholic Marian devoti...
  • A Stake President’s Perspective on Homosexuality
    Dear brothers and sisters, I follow a blog entitled LDS (Mormon) Stake President’s LDS (Mormon) Stake President's Blog , written by Pr...
  • Moving Out and Moving On
    I have wrestled with whether or not I should post today, or at all. The past 24 hours have been extremely difficult and painful. I start...
  • To Young Men Only - The Gay Version
    A very interesting discussion about mixed-orientation marriages (MOMs) evolved in a series of posts on this blog two weeks ago.   (See h...
  • Blaming the Church: Learning to Live with One Arm
    I do not hate the Church, nor do I blame it for everything wrong in my life.   Occasionally, however, commenters will write to say that the...
  • Realtime: Outed By My Teenage Daughter
    Those of you who have been following my blog may remember that I came out to myself in October after hearing President Packer’s address ...
  • Thanksgiving Reflections: Is Being Gay “Worth It”?
    At this Thanksgiving time, I'd like to revisit some thoughts written in response to a comment I received last spring with respect to on...

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