Invictus Pilgrim

A Gay Man's Journey out of the Closet, Marriage and Mormonism toward Self-Love and Self-Discovery

Mixed-Orientation Marriage Posts


At the suggestion of a reader, I have prepared this page in order to list all the posts on this blog that deal with men who are currently in, have been or are contemplating a mixed-orientation marriage (i.e., man is gay, woman is straight, or woman is lesbian, husband is straight).



 "Real" Family vs. The "Family"


 Family Encore: Living With Reality and Finding Peace


 Family: Necessary But Not Sufficent


 Family: Hammering Away at our Souls


 To Young Men Only: The Gay Version


A Situation That Defies Our Nature


Mixed Orientation Marriages Revisited: Peace in Being Real


Mixed Orientation Marriages Revisited: To Just Accept Me


Dear Anonymous: The Matter of "Being Someone You're Not"


The Toll:  Inside a Mormon Mixed-Orientation Marriage


Voices: An Overwhelming Emptiness


Voices: Falling Away


An Overwhelming Emptiness:
Reprise and Reflections



Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
The Challenge


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
My Story, Part 1


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
My Story, Part 2


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
Patriarchy and Duplicity


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues: 
"Turn it Off"


To Young Men Only: 
The Gay Version (v. 1.1)



To The One:
 Suppression and Undeviating Determination



Beards, Masks and MetaFilter:
 New Perspectives



Masks: Landing Gay Side Up


Virtue in Pain


Kiss the Air


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“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

- Marcel Proust


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Pilgrim: One who journeys in foreign lands

One way leads to diamonds,
one way leads to gold,
Another leads you only
To everything you're told.

In your heart you wonder:
Which of these is true:
The road that leads to nowhere,
The road that leads to you ...

Pilgrim in your journey,
You may travel far;
For pilgrim, it's a long way
To find out who you are ...

~ Enya

Popular Posts

  • What About Gay Sex?
    Since starting my blog, I have occasionally received an e-mail or message that concerns gay sex.  Not that anyone was hitting on me.  And i...
  • Glee-ful: Affirmation and Pursuit
      Okay, so as I wrote  here  and  here , I’ve realized that when I got married, I abandoned most of my own interests and tastes in favor...
  • The Mormon Wall: Lunch with Brother John
    I felt disheartened as I walked away from the restaurant.  I had just had lunch with a former priesthood leader (whom I call “John”) who ha...
  • Voices: An Overwhelming Emptiness
    Today’s post contains the words of “Dave.” yet another gay Mormon in a mixed-orientation marriage (MoM).  From time to time, I receive ...
  • Preparing the Way for Change
    The other day, I was having a discussion with a new straight friend, Darren.   He is an active Mormon, a husband and father, who within the...
  • Prayers for Bobby: An Open Letter to Mormon Parents
    “He must have seen the large tractor trailer approaching from under the Couch Street overpass and timed the jump.  Bobby executed a sudden ...
  • No Longer Worthy Enough: One Father’s Voice
    This past Sunday, I went to church just like I have for almost every Sunday for the past 20+ years since becoming a member.   I went to ...
  • Eyes to See and Ears to Hear
    I received an anonymous comment to yesterday’s post that was obviously written by a committed (straight) Mormon.  Because of the nature of...
  • “Real” Family vs. The “Family"
    Today’s post is a reflection on some of the comments that were left on yesterday’s post, entitled “The Family.” There were several comment...
  • Why Would Heavenly Father Do That?
    This now-infamous question (slightly paraphrased) posed by President Boyd K. Packer at October Conference will, I think, reverberate in ...

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