Invictus Pilgrim

A Gay Man's Journey out of the Closet, Marriage and Mormonism toward Self-Love and Self-Discovery

Mixed-Orientation Marriage Posts


At the suggestion of a reader, I have prepared this page in order to list all the posts on this blog that deal with men who are currently in, have been or are contemplating a mixed-orientation marriage (i.e., man is gay, woman is straight, or woman is lesbian, husband is straight).



 "Real" Family vs. The "Family"


 Family Encore: Living With Reality and Finding Peace


 Family: Necessary But Not Sufficent


 Family: Hammering Away at our Souls


 To Young Men Only: The Gay Version


A Situation That Defies Our Nature


Mixed Orientation Marriages Revisited: Peace in Being Real


Mixed Orientation Marriages Revisited: To Just Accept Me


Dear Anonymous: The Matter of "Being Someone You're Not"


The Toll:  Inside a Mormon Mixed-Orientation Marriage


Voices: An Overwhelming Emptiness


Voices: Falling Away


An Overwhelming Emptiness:
Reprise and Reflections



Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
The Challenge


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
My Story, Part 1


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
My Story, Part 2


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues:
Patriarchy and Duplicity


Mormon Beards - Exploring the Issues: 
"Turn it Off"


To Young Men Only: 
The Gay Version (v. 1.1)



To The One:
 Suppression and Undeviating Determination



Beards, Masks and MetaFilter:
 New Perspectives



Masks: Landing Gay Side Up


Virtue in Pain


Kiss the Air


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“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

- Marcel Proust


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  • Boyd K. Packer on Homosexuality
  • Disclaimer

Pilgrim: One who journeys in foreign lands

One way leads to diamonds,
one way leads to gold,
Another leads you only
To everything you're told.

In your heart you wonder:
Which of these is true:
The road that leads to nowhere,
The road that leads to you ...

Pilgrim in your journey,
You may travel far;
For pilgrim, it's a long way
To find out who you are ...

~ Enya

Popular Posts

  • A Stake President’s Perspective on Homosexuality
    Dear brothers and sisters, I follow a blog entitled LDS (Mormon) Stake President’s LDS (Mormon) Stake President's Blog , written by Pr...
  • "The Family"
    A lot is going on in my life right now with my marriage.   I’ll write about it in the days and weeks ahead.   If you like drama, I’m sur...
  • Wes Hempel: Artist, Writer, Gay Man, Observer of Mormonism
    A couple of months ago, while working on a post, I ran across the amazing art of Wes Hempel, an artist and writer who lives in rural Colora...
  • Boyd K. Packer: In Memoriam
    One year ago this weekend, my life was forever changed.  Part of me was fatally wounded.  The shock of the attack took my breath away and ...
  • What About Gay Sex?
    Since starting my blog, I have occasionally received an e-mail or message that concerns gay sex.  Not that anyone was hitting on me.  And i...
  • Forged: Et tu, Paulus?
    “[Paul] is about 5 foot high; very dark hair; dark complexion, dark skin; large Roman nose; sharp face; small black eyes, penetrating as et...
  • To Young Men Only: The Gay Version (v. 1.1)
    I am inserting this post as a sort of “intermission” in the series I started last week on issues relating to mixed-orientation marriages.  ...
  • Dear Anonymous: Understanding What it Means to be a Gay Mormon
    “ Give therefore thy servant an understanding heart … ” ~ 1 Kings 3:9 This is my seventh letter to Anonymous.  For those who may ...
  • Trembling Before G-d: Secrets of the Soul
    Trembling Before G-d is a documentary about gay Orthodox Jews attempting to reconcile their sexuality with their faith.  The parallels...
  • Icarus: Did I Fly Too High?
    T hese past two weeks since I started this blog have been a roller coaster, taking me to dizzying heights, then plunging me into deep d...

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